In the Defense of Politicians, and the Women who Marry Them

Many of you may have read Em’s recent note about the danger of marrying those motivated by power – timely thoughts in light of the recent takedown of New York Governor Spitzer. For those who have not read it, here is a link.

I don’t patently disagree with anything my dear roommate says. But a singular thought rose unbidden to my mind as I read. Simply this: “politicians are people too.” An oversimplification, but true nevertheless. And I do realize that my very astute roommate knows there is a difference between the politician and the power hungry, but so few recognize the distinction anymore that I will treat the class as a whole. While I despise being thought of as naïve, I must confess my abiding belief that a good number (I won’t venture to say “a majority” or “a few” – God alone knows the hearts of men) at least get started in politics with the very best of intentions. While they’re out there, not too many people wake up one day and think to themselves that they should get elected to Congress or as governor so they can get away with whatever they want.

No, people get into politics to change things. The problem with too many is the fact that what changes is themselves. This happens to varying degrees, resulting in public officials with reputations ranging from questionable to slimy. But the fact is that for every Duke Cunningham and Eliot Spitzer who gets caught and humiliated, there are hundreds of public officials, whose names few will remember, abiding by the law and trying to do what’s right by their constituency. I know. I’ve had the privilege of working with a handful of them. But they aren’t the stuff of enticing headlines or political water cooler gossip – precisely because they’re doing the right thing.

And that is, in many cases, what I think attracts women to political men. Sure, some Senators have had more wives than I have toes, but plenty of political figures married their high school sweetheart. Even the most cynical should be realistic enough to admit there is something compelling about a young person with a desire to change the world. Who can blame a woman for standing by her man when he tries to make a difference?

Ambition itself is not an evil – but it is a great evil indeed when put in the service of self. But this is as true when a wife makes imprudent decisions with the family’s budget to indulge her desire for the latest fashions, or Joe Office Worker allows the perceived need to work overtime to alienate his relationship with his wife and kids.

Perhaps ambition is largely in the eye of the beholder. Even in our enlightened 21^st century, I can think of those who have been told it is overly ambitious for a woman to work for a college degree or be in military service. But we almost universally criticize the ambition of politicians because they are few in number, and disconnected from us; but most of all because the relative consequences of their sins can be so huge and so public. We can consider their ambition viler because it can lead to big-ticket felonies like extortion and blackmail – even as we think little of the ambition that makes us exasperated at the person who took credit for our work, cut us off in traffic, or got the last verbal jab in an argument.

I know half of you are shaking your heads and thinking I have taken my relatively positive experience with the dreaded politician species to overprotect the class as a whole. But are my experiences any less valid than the media hype that has surrounded the political blockbusters of our time? Are those relatively few cases any more worthy of being considered an accurate microcosm of the whole?

*breath*

Rant over. I just had to get that out. I grow weary of hearing about how awful politicians are, as if being elected to office is the same as going to trial and being found guilty of first degree murder. Perhaps we see what power lust can do to a man, and we fear our own capacity to be drawn into the vortex. Such aversion is admirable, but in denying the humanity of those who may or may not be drawn in through the particular vice of politics we only kid ourselves about the danger of our own daily battles for power.