The Thing About Love

… is that it ceases to exist the moment it expects recompense, requite, payment in kind. Where such an expectation develops, you are no longer in the sphere of eternal values; you have shifted into a worldly, utilitarian economy that demands return on investment and calculated risk. A decision-making process that always hedges its bets, ready to jettison if need be.
How different this is from true love:

“Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails… and now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.” from I Corinthians 13

I’ve heard those verses repeated in dozens of weddings over the years. The association that developed was this: these people have “found love,” and I’m still looking for it.
That statement may very well be true – but not for the reasons I thought.
In some ways, I am in a better position in life to truly love than most. Why? Because aside from familial relations, I have no reasonable expectation that anyone should return my love for and service to them. But the truth is, I expect affection-in-kind all the time. I assume that my self-perceived sacrifices will be lauded, my concern for others returned. And as such, my service ceases to be love. Maybe it was never motivated by love in the first place. Perhaps it’s regular ol’ run-of-the-mill attention and affection-seeking.
And without enough time on my own, maybe I would’ve never seen it that way. I would have not realized that, single or otherwise, love is only love if it suffers long, is immune from jealousy and self-interest, if it never, ever, ever stops believing...

I hate the fact that love cannot expect to be returned, until I remember Love Himself. How Love laid down His life for me, and offered me the gift of Redemption - the same gift He places at the feet of everyone created in His image. Some refuse the gift, and others accept it – but the Giver, in offering Himself, demonstrated love to both. And reflect on where I would be if He had waited for me to prove my love to Him.
This isn't my natural idea of love. It's much harder, much more beautiful. And I can't get there on my own. But Love promised to make me, of all people, more like Himself.
Just one facet of what's so amazing about Grace.